I freely admit it. I was fat. I know a lot of people don’t like that word, but it is true. Using any other word sugar coats the truth.
I was not overweight.
I was not “big boned.”
I was fat.
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| August 2006 - 212 lbs |
According to my BMI, I was technically obese. Being 5’¼” (and yes, I claim that ¼ inch!) and weighing 212 lbs, I had a BMI (body mass index) of 41.4%. For some reason, I didn’t quite see myself as “obese” or even as fat as I truly was.
How did I get that way? And how in the world did I not see how heavy I truly was? I knew I wasn’t athletic and didn’t exercise, but I certainly didn’t think I ate THAT much or THAT badly…did I?
During the week, breakfast was usually 2 Krispy Kreme Donuts or McDonald’s Sausage McMuffin and hash browns and a pint whole milk picked up on the way to work. On the weekends, breakfast was usually eaten out.
Lunch was usually eaten at the local fast food restaurant. A typical order would be a McDonald’s cheeseburger, a 6-piece McNugget (with sweet & sour sauce), a small fry, and a giant Diet Pepsi. I rationalized this by thinking that if I ordered a small fry and diet soda, that the meal wasn’t that bad.
Dinner was usually eaten out. At any restaurant, take your pick. Suffice it to say it was usually high in carbs (lots of potatoes, pasta or bread), high in fat and calories, and low on veggies.
Let’s not forget the snacks I would have on a nightly basis. This usually included potato chips or Cheetos (usually the whole bag) or chocolate (usually the whole bar), and tons of soda throughout the day. Well, at least the soda was diet.
All totaled, this counted to about 3,000 calories per day. That is about twice as much as someone my age and height should be consuming in a day.
Sure, I knew I was carrying more junk in the trunk then I would have liked. I knew I weighed more then I should. I knew that I was wearing a size 2X and a size 18 - 20 pants. I diluted myself into thinking that with a little portion control I could get my weight down.
I didn’t need to exercise.
I didn’t need to eat healthy food.
I thought that if I just watched my portions, I would lose the weight. The only problem is that I never did that. I continued to eat the same portions and things I always did, and just whined about the fact that the weight didn't come off. This went on for years.
One day, I saw a picture of myself sitting on our couch and I could not believe I was so big. I honestly thought I was looking at someone else. Even this did not coax me into losing weight.
I noticed that it was getting harder and harder for me to basically get around. I hated doing anything that required physical activity because it was just too much effort. Simply getting up to move was a chore. I hated parking any further away from the first row in the parking lot. The worse part is that it wasn’t because I couldn't physically do activities; it was because my weight made me not want to do them anymore. When the electronic carts that they have to help disabled people in the stores started looking really good every time I passed them, I knew something had to change.
I realized that I couldn’t keep doing the same thing I was doing and expect different results. I knew I had to drastically change what I was doing to drastically change my body. I had seen commercials for weight loss products on television (which I’m ashamed to say became my favorite pastime) and had been thinking about Nutrisystem. After much thought, I decided it was the best option for me. Microwave and eat sounded really good to me. I started the program on February 16, 2008.
When I signed up, I didn’t expect to be on the program forever. I also didn’t start with the idea that once I reached my goal weight I would go back to living like I did before - eating what I did before and little or no exercise. To lose the weight and keep it off, I had to learn a new way of life.
The other day I tried on a size 2 – that’s right, that’s not a typo – a size 2 – pair of pants and they fit me! I never dared to dream I’d ever wear this size. I now weigh 124.4 lbs and my BMI is a healthy 24.35. On future posts I will share my milestones and what I did. It will be kind of reverse blogging because, well, I wasn't keeping a blog at the time. Darn it!
